Okay, first of all, I don't really care what conservatives and their organizations do with their money as long as it doesn't encourage ordinary people to piss on the environment or support politicians who are wholly owned servants of billionaire merchants of evil. They can gather together to read passages from Ayn Rand's "Atlas Shrugged" for all I care... and they probably do. Until a few minutes ago I thought that was about the extent of Republicans' interest in pornography, except to insist that it be banned.
But I was wrong, big time. Certain Republicans ARE interested in pornography, and some of the more influential of them have just been called out for spending their organization's money to produce a video which included a brief scene in which a female intern dressed as a giant panda simulated oral sex on another intern wearing a Hillary Clinton mask.
Believe it or not, this video was originally meant to be shown at the FreePAC conference in Dallas on July 26th of last year, to thousands of grassroots and religious fundamentalist conservatives. Someone familiar with the content of the promotional video managed to convince those in charge to scrap plans to air the video at that conference, or we would (no doubt!) have heard about this months ago.
You might expect something this bizarre (and can you think of a more appropriate word for it?) to have been dreamed up by some misguided underling at FreedomWorks, perhaps another intern with a limited budget and time on his hands. Maybe a rational person could find a way to explain this as some sort of sick joke, never meant to be made public. But no... this film was produced under the direct supervision of Executive Vice President Adam Brandon of FreedomWorks, and it was meant to be shown at an arena filled with fundie conservatives from across the country.
Someone planned this scene, purchased costumes, paid interns to act out a simulated oral sex scene, and filmed the show with the intent to display it at a conference of sexually repressed Jesus Freaks in Texas.
To help promote Tea Party conservative Republican values.
You can't make this shit up, no one would ever believe it.
No word on when we'll get to see a bootlegged copy of the video, but you know there's one out there and sooner or later someone will find a way to get it online.
Needless to say, lawyers for the organization are now intensely investigating this matter, and you can expect folks who are regularly stricken with the "highly offended" virus to fall ill once again.
It sort of reminds me of the brief scene in Kubrick's The Shining when Jack Nicholson's character is walking though the Overlook Hotel and finding hallucinations around every corner.
I truly believe this is a worthy use of conservatives' cash. Much better than funding the campaigns of people like Rand Paul or Paul Ryan. It's far better for costumed pandas to get screwed than it would be for the entire country.