According to an article in this morning's The Tennessean (motto: "Did we mention we recently won some journalism awards?") eight statewide chapters of the Tennessee Republican Party have passed resolutions calling for unspecified "sanctions" of our governor for his "consistent lack of conservative values".
Sometimes I wonder if Joseph McCarthy would be conservative enough to make the average teabaggers of this state happy. Other times I'm quite certain they wouldn't know "happy" if it crawled up their asses and made their tiddlies wink.
When Governor Bill Haslam was elected along with a solid conservative majority in the state legislature, I was worried that the lunatics of the Tea Party would have free reign to pass into law any batshit crazy bills they brought before the General Assembly. After all, a conservative Republican millionaire oil company executive could hardly be expected to ride herd over the good ol' boys and their legislative agenda, especially since he seemed to embrace most of their ideas himself.
But while I might be unhappy with many of the positions our governor has taken since his inauguration, he has, for the most part, been one of the few voices of reason in Nashville. You only have to look at the bills Haslam has refused to sign into law to realize just how much embarrassment he's saved this state.
But to the teabagger base of the Republican Party, any effort at moderation or compromise is seen as a fatal betrayal worthy of condemnation. To put it mildly, they're so mad they could just spit!
Haslam didn't push for a law to allow gun owners to leave their loaded weapons in their cars while at work, and that put an NRA target on his back. He also retained a few key Democrats from the last governor's administration, which the GOP zealots consider heresy. He didn't support efforts to rebuke Agenda 21, a United Nations resolution that was passed over twenty fucking years ago that conspiracy theorists from the John Birch Society believe to be a communist plot. The Governor has allowed openly gay folks to serve in the Department of Children's Services, and you know we must think of the children...
But by far, the thing that has teabaggers' panties in a wad is the fact that Haslam hired a Tennessee-born Muslim to serve as the state's Department of Economic and Community Development's international director. To the wingnutters, this Muslim woman (who was named one of thirteen White House fellows in 2010, served as class president during her time at Vanderbilt University, and who was once employed by the Department of Homeland Security) is ACTUALLY a "financial jihadist" planted at the highest levels of our state government with the intention of bringing Sharia Law to our rural courthouses.
That's right. Governor Haslam has a Muslim working in his administration. And once you let that camel get its nose under your Klan robe, well, you know what happens next. You end up with camels in the Klan. And we just can't have that.
So they've passed these meaningless resolutions to let the Governor know they're keeping an eye on his ass, and that he'd better toe the line during the next session of the General Assembly if he knows what's good for him. They want sex education out of our public schools, guns and prayer meetings IN our public schools, and they want to make sure homosexuals, Islam, and evolution don't come up for discussion in those classes. By god.
If the Governor of the state of Tennessee wants my undying support (and I've never supported a Republican in my life) all he has to do is call a press conference, reference these resolutions of sanction for his lack of conservative values, then calmly extend a double barrel one finger salute to the Tea Party and the jackasses who belong to it.
Those idiots have done more to bring ridicule to the state than anything since Hee Haw was on prime time, and they don't deserve another minute's worth of attention for their lunacy.